One Single Thing

As I begin to fill these online pages with my ramblings I feel that you should really understand my main motivator for getting healthy and undertaking the bariatric surgery, and that is my daughter T. My daughter is now 3 and a half but I think to really understand my motivations you need to understand the journey that I went through to become a mum.

I was a pretty late bloomer when it came to wanting a baby, in fact it wasn’t until after I met my current husband that I even considered being in a stable enough environment that a baby could be a part of my life. I made the mistake of marrying my emotionally unstable university boyfriend in my early 20’s and it was very clear that I could and would never want to bring a baby into that dynamic. So really I wasn’t expecting that I would decide that motherhood would be for me.

But a divorce later and I met my Husband Wayne and then suddenly it was like someone had flipped a switch and my biological clock started ticking, and I was desperate for a baby. So much so that when we were trying for T I was boarding on obsessive. At one point I was doing about 9 pregnancy tests a week. I had to stop buying them, as they had become a staple of the food shop.

The day I found out I was pregnant was literally the best day ever. I found out I was pregnant when I was home alone and had to keep it in and to myself all day. It was the best secret I’ve ever had to keep. My pregnancy wasn’t plain sailing however, I had some early bleeding which had to be monitored and then I developed Gestational Diabetes which was insulin dependant and then I was hit with Pre Eclampsia. So when it was decided that I was to have a C-Section and on which date I couldn’t wait. I had never been so excited in my entire life.

And on the 19th November 2014 my daughter arrived. To find out that she was a girl was the most surreal moment ever, I spent a good 10 minutes literally just repeating, ‘ITS A GIRL’ over and over again.

I was not prepared for the bulldozer of emotions I felt as soon as she was placed in my arms, and every moment of every single day since. I could never believe how much I would love my daughter and how literally every second of every day I would love her more and more. And because of this, I had to do something drastic to ensure that my health needed to improve to ensure that I could give T the best life possible. She is my biggest motivator for bariatric surgery. And I know when my surgery is done and my life starts changing, my relationship with my daughter will just go from strength to strength, and I cant wait.